Balancing Academics and Extracurricular Activities

You met the  and have come back each Wednesday to read what they have to say on the newest parenting question. Last week, we invited Wantagh-Seaford Patch parents to join the discussion. 

Spring brings school sports, musicals and other extracurricular activities for students. This week's question is: How do you encourage your kids to get involved while making sure they are still able to focus on academics? 

Jane Cappiello

After school activities can be a wonderful way to develop young bodies and minds for the present day and for a child’s future. Developing interests outside the school day should be encouraged in my opinion. The school day is often long and challenging for a child or adolescent. Opportunity to develop talents and interests are gifts which can be explored when a child needs a break from his or her usual routine of academics.

Happiness and satisfaction while learning something new is the goal. I think as parents, we agree that we are satisfied when our children are having a good time as well as learning. In fact, learning usually happens best when a child is participating in an enjoyable experience.

The trouble begins when a parent lives through his or her child. I am not ashamed to say I have done this. The result: I made unreasonable demands on my children. I loved dancing. I encouraged one of my daughters to dance. She did not like it. It was difficult for her to get into it emotionally, even though she could physically handle the exercises. I kept pressing. She performed well in her assigned group, and the audience responded to her as if she were a little darling. I was proud, but she was unhappy. This pattern developed between us. Everything suffered. The balancing act of carting my three older children all over town, once a happy parental privilege, was now becoming a dreaded chore.

After much thought, I let my children choose their own path. I feel lucky that I was able to catch my over-zealous needs imposed on my children. My home became a peaceful place. I was less stressed and most importantly, homework was being completed with thought and focus.

Cathy Fressle

I always engourage my kids to particiapte and get involved with activities, but it can get a little crazy at times with having to concentrate on practice when your homework has to be done too. I think the more involved they are in sports, clubs, etc. the better rounded they are and the more they tend to stay out of trouble; it keeps them busy. I think it is a great thing for them, as long as they can handle everything and balance it. 

Kathleen Vaughan Ware

The smell of a fresh cut lawn, the sound of a ball hitting a bat, the crowd cheering for the goalie's saves, giggling girls after a close game of hoops, and after game barbeques and cocktails. Spring has sprung!

I am a firm believer that extracurricular activities are important to a child’s growth. Currently, my daughter plays lacrosse, volleyball, basketball and soccer and is involved in various community service projects.

I’m not concerned about my daughter being a multisport athlete. My son played baseball, basketball and golf before he went to college. The special bonds that were formed with teammates on the field and on the bus rides will forever be a part of his life. Currently, my daughter has been selected to play on premier travel teams in both basketball and lacrosse. These will require overnight tournaments with the team, something we look forward to as it is new to us, and will allow the girls to form a unique friendship as both teams are composed of sixth grade girls from all across Long Island.

According to the Women’s Sports Foundation, girls and women who play sports have higher levels of confidence and self-esteem and lower levels of depression. Sport is where girls can learn goal-setting, strategic thinking and the pursuit of excellence in performance and other achievement-oriented behaviors—critical skills necessary for success in the workplace.

Thankfully, the structure we set at home has worked out. Homework is completed before anything, even if it means missing a practice. I often tell my daughter the same thing I told my son- do not think a bat or ball will get you into a good college, strong academics will. Don’t get me wrong, if my child is lucky enough to be selected to play college sports that would be a bonus, but maintaining a good grade point average is the priority.

Glancing out the window, I find myself smiling as I watch her practice her lay-ups and three point shots in the driveway, listening to her yell “and the crowd goes wild!” to herself. 

Now if only I could get her to cut the lawn…